Monday, November 16, 2009

there's something about the air

so work has been going well, busy but good. there is something kind of odd going around with all of our families, some things seem to be extra chaotic and we can't decide if it's the weather, this time of year, or perhaps too much dairy. i don't know what that means, i just had to add a third thing on the list for some reason. i took off work early today because i had a sinus head ache, and this was my first one ever, so i have much more sympathy for people who say they have a sinus head ache, i now understand. and later in the evening my boss called me asking where one of my clients lived, i told him and said "why, are you meeting up with them?" which this never happens in a normal situation so i instantly knew that something had gone wrong. he said "yes, SRS was called and we have to go over there now, i will tell you all about it tomorrow". so, this obviously is not good news and this has been a very chaotic family since the beginning (July). however it did make me wonder, if i was at work would this same thing have happened? i had called this mother five times in the morning from 9-noon because i knew they had a scheduled meeting tonight and i wanted to confirm a meeting with them for tomorrow, however mom never answered and never returned my calls (which is unusual for this family). i was on my drive to pick matthew up from work because his car wouldn't start this morning. his car is fine, just hates the cold weather and we were leaving at the same time so it was just easier to take him then wonder if he caught the bus, etc.
so, i let myself burden myself with this families issue for a few minutes. wondering if i could have done anything different. then i stopped myself, and reminded myself not to feel burdened or internalize any of the negative things i see and hear every day (there are lots of good things i see too) but when you feel compassion and empathy for families it is also easy to drown yourself in their problems too. i take myself back and remember that i can only help people who want help, and even then i can only do so much. their burdens are not there for me to carry. i know that it is all worth it at the end of the day even if i only help 2 out of ten, at least those two were helped, right?
i also know that things happen for a reason. and whatever happens with this family (i obviously don't know the whole story yet) but there could be an issue of the mother losing custody of her kids and as sad as that is, it might be something that saves this family.
i want to continue to help, to be energized to help those that want it, and know that my part is my part and the rest is up to them.
i continue to work from a place of goodness, to try and see the bigger picture more often. i know that even a little is better than nothing, and i'll strive for a lot...

do you love recess?

i went shopping on saturday with my mom and sister. it is always great having that girl time together to catch up, have fun, and grow closer. we were at an outlet store, which any sort of store/mall on a saturday is one of my least favorite things to do. i don't like all the crowds, all the hurrying, people not walking my speed, etc. but i managed to enjoy myself because of the company i was with, plus i really like people watching. i was in the little girls section of old navy looking for a cute top possibility for my niece. a mom and her daughter were slowly getting closer to me, and eventually pushed me out of the isle as i leaned into some clothes and made some weird noise that made only myself laugh as i walked away.. but before that the mom was looking at every single shirt and reading it to her daughter. the girl was around 9 or ten so i am pretty sure she could read all of these herself, which was kind of the funny part to me.
the mom -"ohhh i like recess (reading the shirt), amber! do YOU like recess??"
eight seconds later, the mom -"ohhh marshmellows, amber do YOU like marshmellows?"

you get the idea :)