Dogs

So who else is sick of sob stories about car trouble? How about some pictures of our pup's instead? It's a special treat for them to get a new toy because Ellie (the little one) goes nuts and rips any toy to shreds in about four minutes. Thankfully toys are the only thing she chews on but when she does, look out. Jaxon will get a toy and just pose all cute, like he is here with his duck. Also his eyes are half open because of the flash on my camera, but it works out because this is what he looks like on rainy days, we call him squints.
Ellie is displaying her new toy, a red and white ball that was actually very hard for her to rip into, so good purchase.
And after a long day of playing these two usually curl up together on Jaxon's bed. Hope you had a great weekend, will post more soon!

What a pain...

So, after that really great weekend we had it ended in a not so fun way. After our bike ride on Sunday we decided to pick up lunch from Jimmy John's and the second I finished eating I felt sick. It could have been a culmination of things including but not limited to; over exercising, eating the wrong foods, dehydration, etc. But all I can tell you is I have never experienced those kind of pains in my stomach before. I could barely move, and spent the rest of the evening on and off heating my stomach because that was the only thing that gave me temporary relief. I even called in sick on Monday to my new job, it was that bad! Matt had a somewhat surprise procedure Monday morning on his tooth that made half of his face completely numb so he decided to take his lunch hour at home (to check on me, also to wait till the drooling subsided before going back to work :) We were quite the pair, but thankfully he felt better quickly and finished out the work day. I decided that if the pains were the same in the morning I would go to the doctor because it even hurt to roll from one side to the other. I went in to work this morning, even made it through a new family meeting and had an afternoon appointment with the doctor.

I met with a doctor I have never seen before. It turns out she was a younger woman and a breath of fresh air in the amount of time she spent actually listening to me and trying to figure out what was wrong, what we could do next, etc. (Rather than a doctor I have had before who doesn't listen, talks too fast, and he writes prescriptions so fast your head will spin). I had some blood drawn and I know it will all be just fine and I would much rather they say "you obviously can't handle pain well, go home ya baby" then to have anything be wrong. So it will all be just fine. It was kind of funny though when the nurse was drawing blood.. it usually never bothers me and when she pulled the needle out I actually said "ow!"

So I leave the doctor's office a bit more in pain then what I started with. But to add some flavor to this already long day of mine, I get no more than 50 yards out of the parking lot and as I am on the phone with Matt I said "I have to go, my car is making a weird noise". He said "what kind of weird noise?", and I said "well, it sounds like it did when my lug nuts fell off... I bet I have a flat tire... oh jeez, I'm gonna have to call you back". I pull over, put my hazards on, go to the suspected tire and sure enough I have a flat tire!

I call Matt back and by this time my energy is pretty well spent. I had a quick vision of me having to change my very first tire by myself, in my work clothes, without the proper tools. And instead of breaking a window, I start to cry. Not a real full on cry, but a I am so frustrated I just want to be home and I kind of want to hit something kind of cry. Sometimes in moments like these guys hit things, and sometimes women cry. Matt is somewhat familiar with this behavior and he is ready to leave work to help me, but I figured I call my Dad because he might be on a break from work but he doesn't answer, then I think to call my brother because I was somewhat in his neighborhood.. much more so then I would have been near Matt's work. But my brother was still at work even further from where I was. So after calling the men in my life (my sister is busy with her son, and my mom just had foot surgery)...

Finally I realize the best and easiest solution is to call Triple A for the second time in about 4 months (Thanks Dad for my membership!) and within thirty minutes these two nice young guys come to my rescue. The one guy gets out and sees that I have a band aid where they drew blood, and he says "ahhh, first that now this?" It made me smile and reminded me that it was just a stupid flat tire and there are much worse things. I immediately felt grateful and drove away completely fine. Bonus- five cars pulled over to ask if I needed help in that short time I was sitting there, so that was refreshing.

Surprisingly my stomach feels a little better, I had some more watermelon and I am going to eat a delicious dinner and get some good sleep tonight. It's funny how sometimes these things, these life annoyances come all on the same week, or even the same day. And you just gotta roll with it, and that guy whipping his arms about like a mad man in road rage on my way home made me smile and throw him the peace sign (which probably made him more upset) but perspective is what it's all about. And my perspective tonight and hopefully most nights is gratitude and being present.

4th of July!

To keep with our tradition that we started three years ago, we spent the holiday at my sister's house and the minute it got dark we began to play with sparklers, a flashlight, and a long exposure. Matt was the master mind behind the photography, and woah, he is talented.
We started the night with delicious appetizers, then cooked out on the grill and spent the entire evening on their back porch. Kestan was busy running all over the back yard, taking rocks and putting them near the dogs, trying to dig holes with Uncle Matt and overall just being a cute, really really cute, sweaty little boy.
Kestan also fell from the sky.
Me and my sparkler friend.
Of course a classic Star Wars recreation by me and Matthew. It was a really great weekend. Both Matt and I had Friday off, by the way I am in love with three day weekends. I cooked a delicious tomato basil quiche. We went on a bike ride to my dad's house on Saturday and then Sunday we met two women I work with and their husbands for a lovely bike ride. The weather was gorgeous and we all had a great time. Hope you enjoyed your fourth as well!

Grandma and Grandpa

After we spent the day in Omaha we made our way up to our grandparents' house. It was the first time I remember ever having just the two of them and myself, dad, sister, and nephew. We are blessed to have such a large extended family, but it was very nice getting a chance to really catch up with Grandma and Grandpa with no agenda or family reunion to compete with.
They have maintained and share a very beautiful garden near their apartment, after my first ham sandwich for lunch (not a huge fan) we spent the afternoon breezing in the garden and in a pretty gazebo just catching up.
My dad and Kestan spent some time chilling in the garden as well.
My grandpa has had this "tilly" hat, I believe it is called, for as long as I can remember. And once Kestan started wearing his big ol' cute hat for the summer it immediately reminded me of grandpa's hat... so naturally we had to get a nice picture of the two of them looking so good.

Tiny Treasures

A few weeks ago my mom showed me this framed picture with some fabric inside of and asked me if I recognized it. I said yes, it used to hang in my bedroom throughout my childhood and hadn't seen it in a few years. It turns out that it was a baby's bonnet that my Grandma on my dad's side had made for me. She made it for all the Granddaughters (which is some amazing number as my dad is one of 10 kids and everyone has at least two kids beyond that). My mom had framed the bonnet, and attached the card on the back of the frame that read this; "A tiny square of linen and a dainty edge of lace, designed into a bonnet to frame your baby's face. After baby's warn it fold and tuck away, and it becomes a hanky for baby's wedding day." Well, it brought a tear to my eyes and I am so thankful for the sweet gift and my mom taking such great care of it, and believe me I will have it with me on the big day in less than four months away!

freckle face

I drove to Wichita for a work conference and although it was about 98* out, the drive was full of sunshine and great clouds like these. The conference was about juvenile justice and all the things wrapped up in to that category (gangs, sexual exploitation of youth, jail, and intervention programs like the one I work for). It's an under appreciated field, and there's not a lot of money in it, but the work is pure, tough, and life changing. There was a priest there that works with ex-gang members in LA and started his own Homeboy Industries (they have a cool website if you're interested) and the work he does is so intense and he left us with a great feeling of passion, and if you enjoy what you do every day (or at least most days) than that's a great thing. And the hopeless need hope.

I had spent two nights in a hotel by myself with no dogs and no books, by the end of the day I had little energy to write or read anyways. So some mindless t.v. and a few pictures documenting my state of mind. I think our connection to our body is very interesting. How some people are consumed with clothes, and hair, and whatever else. Don't get me wrong those are all nice things, but they are not who we are as people. And the things people notice about your appearance because we are a very visually driven society. Recently, someone told me I looked like Lindsay Lohan. Now at first I may have been a little offended, but then it hit me that this woman has rarely seen another person with freckles so she just equated the fact that we both have freckles. Like me and Evangeline Lily both have dark hair (someone also told me I looked like her, but we were in the process of possibly buying his house so I think it was just a good selling tactic). Believe it or not, but I sometimes forget that I have freckles. And that every year I have recieved more and more freckles, and to see a home video of me when I was eleven, I had set up the video camera on the edge of the table so I could run through the list of impressions I was learning... true story. But at the time I did not have one single freckle on my neck or chest, just emerging all over my face. It's interesting how some days I can feel so connected with my body and every move that I make, and other days I feel I live more through my mind and the idea of "living from the inside out". I want to accept my body for all that it is and all that it is not but also that feeling of just living and not getting wrapped up in those little things.

Chicago!

My good friend Megan and I went to visit her sister Ashleigh in Chicago over the weekend. We got not so cheap tickets last minute because Ash's friends were throwing her a bachelorette party in town and we just had to crash the party. We showed up at Ashleigh's door and she was so shocked that we were there she just kept saying "What?!" It was very cute and completely worth the trip.
We did lots of dancing throughout the night, here we are impersonating an SNL character.. actually Kathy Lee... really it's too long of a story if you're not familiar with the character, but let me tell you we cracked ourselves up with this one. :)
And on our last day we took a boat tour of all the cool buildings in down town Chicago. It was a gorgeous day, interesting tour, and overall just a great trip.