Horses horses horses....

Do you know that part in Sleepless in Seattle when Meg Ryan is singing along to the christmas song on the radio? Well, either way she just repeats the song as it echos 'horses horses horses....'.  Moving on, life continues to be great and I will forever be grateful.  Our daughter (still fun saying that) is incredible and she is growing so much!  She is full of smiles, seriously all the time, even when she gets upset you can guarantee that a few seconds later she will shoot you a quick smile (it helps especially if you are feeling tired). 
We have our fresh real tree up in the living room, lights and ornaments will go up tonight.  The house smells like pine and the Carpenters and Amy Grant christmas cds have already been played a time or two.  I am only on the computer for a few minutes a day (if that) these days so I have not been writing on this thing much.
I plan to update with holiday photos soon, but until then.. hope everyone is having a great start to the winter and getting a chance to spend some quality time with your loved ones!

If you don't like mushy stuff, stop reading now.

This post is all about how freakin happy we are.  Well, I am. I know my husband is too and the more smiles I get out of Brynn I can tell how happy she is too, but I will just speak for myself.  I am over-joyed.  We are getting used to the lack of sleep and even though I have to down my turkey sandwich at lunch quicker than we used to at a school lunch (if Brynn is seeking my attention at that time) and I can still only get one or two things "accomplished" on my to do list for one day, I am just thrilled to be Brynn's mom and to have Matt as her dad. 

We celebrated my mom's birthday last night and made delicious home made pizzas.  Along with my two nephews there is a lot of baby to toddler energy and the house is just filled with love.  It is fun to see my family members revel in Brynn's beauty and joyful spirit.  She is starting to show more of her personality and it's wonderful.  Brynn is a content baby overall, unless of course she is hungry (she gets that from me).

Matt and I will be celebrating our two year anniversary on Monday and I just get this goofy smile on my face every time I think about the past two years, especially the past year.  The goofy smile then transitions to an overall feeling of goodness.

A few of my good friends have either just had a baby in the past few months or are pregnant now and I just love sharing stories with them about similar and new experiences.

That is enough mushy stuff for one post, right?  The next post will be all about rocks and dirt and stuff that doesn't make anyone smile.  Actually, probably not....  

6 weeks, what?!

Our little girl just turned 6 weeks old and it is crazy.  Crazy good, but still crazy.  She is barely 8lbs but we can definitely tell how big she is getting and how much she has changed since we first met her.  It is still so weird to me that she grew inside of me for so many months and all the anticipation of waiting to see her, meet her, and get to know her.  She has started smiling and holds eye contact better and better every day.  She has started "talking" and I loveeee it.  I can already tell that at each new phase there will be great excitement and a little heartache at realizing how fast time really does fly and how quickly our child will be growing closer to independence.  That is the point though right?  To raise them with love and try to fill their memories with smarts and as many sweet moments as possible and then to let them go do their thing. 

Matt took this photo of me at 2:00 a.m. about an hour after Brynn joined us and I was calling my mom to tell her the good news.  I can vividly remember the i.v. in one arm (which was only used to give me an anti-nausea medicine towards the end of labor after I threw up twice) and that damn blood pressure thing on my right arm and was so relieved when I had full use of my arms back.

And then to have this little girl in our arms it was just so surreal to me.  I am amazed at how we have grown in to our family and even in the hard moments where we haven't slept much, we still figure it out.  We make the best choices for our family and always strive to do better. 

The first time I drove alone with Brynn in the back seat I was nervous.  Now I still get a little stressed if she starts crying and I can't soothe her right away but I know she will be okay.  Today we were about five minutes from home when she started to bug out.  At each stop light I reached back to try and give her the pacifier and talk to her, touch her face and let her hold my finger.  She actually seemed to calm down when she got to squeeze my finger and I sang to her... so I did that until we got home and laughed at myself all the way home.  I will look like an idiot and strain my back and arm any day if it helps calm my sweet little girl. 

Now I get to see this precious sight down the hall in my very own home.  I love that we can start our own family traditions and as excited as I am for the future I am trying to be very present with each new stage or event (even her first blow out of the diapers was gross but still her first! :)

This is my view most days... how sweet is that?!  Most of the time Brynn falls asleep pretty easily but about once a day she fights sleep and then finally passes out.  I love when she is just out, she looks so comfy and cozy.  I am just so thrilled to be Brynn's mom and look forward to each new day (especially after I get a few hours of sleep).

Baby life...

We have welcomed an amazing little girl into our lives and she has been with us for almost three weeks!  Sleeping two to four hours in a row is a big adjustment, but totally worth it.  This child is beautiful beyond belief, sweet as can be, makes the funniest facial expressions and the cutest squeaky noises kind of like a bird/goose.  We get to see her be more alert and awake every day and love all the cuddle time we get with her. 

Being a mom to my little girl is more than I could have ever imagined.  I am so grateful.

Photo update

We went to Powell Gardens today and had a nice time enjoying nature and taking pictures.  I got lots of walking in too which I am trying to do every day from now until baby's delivery.  Everything else is going well.  I have one more week of work until I start my maternity leave and that is oh so nice.  We went grocery shopping tonight and I just love having such good food in the house.  I have loved my breakfast meals the most and tonight we had brinner (breakfast for dinner) a delicious omelet with fresh basil, onions, hashbrowns.  So good!

Feeling good

Hey ya'll.  We had our baby shower a week ago and it was oh so lovely.  We are feeling very blessed and excited by all the extra support we have around us.  We got some great things for our little one to get to use when she joins us and she is set on the cutest clothes and hats!  Oh the hats....

The pink and black one were given to us by my mother-in-law.  I gave Matt the "I heart daddy" one because it was too cute to pass up.  And the other four were made by a friend of mine and one of my mom's friends. 
Our little one's bedroom has been put together nicely and most everything is in it's proper place just waiting to be used.

We got this cute wall hanging from my aunt and cousins, it made a sweet addition to her room.

I made this metal wall hanging a few nights ago and borrowed the phrase "Hope, Grow and Love" from one of my new favorite pregnancy t-shirts.  We are almost finished with her birthing class and already feel more prepared for labor and delivery.  I have a few more weeks of work and many more nights of dreaming about meeting this little one!

There's a baby in there...

A few weeks ago we went to visit our friends Dale and Jamee and we explained to their little girl Lili that there is a baby inside my belly.  Now if I make a funny noise because of a new cramp or elbow to my belly button we will say "there's a baby in there".  Pretty cute, really.  We were walking to our car after leaving the grocery store a few nights ago and this nice couple walked past us, looked at my belly and then said "Congratulations!"  I quickly said thank you and smiled the rest of the way to the car.  We went bowling a few nights ago and it was funny to hold a ten pound bowling ball next to my baby belly.

 Things are starting to get busy around here and although everything is going well it is still nice to take a few moments to stop and breathe.  To just stare at my stomach and watch parts of my belly raise and lower because of an active little one moving around.

We went swimming for the first time this summer! I can't believe we have waited this long, but oh did that cool pool feel nice after the temperature in my car on the way over read 108!  Stay cool, ya'll.

The three of us

We spent a few hours at the very place we took our wedding day photos to take our maternity photos.  We then went to a nearby park to get some more beautiful outdoor shots.  I love having these photos. And after a very busy week it was nice to just spend time standing next to my very cute, very sweet husband.

It was a little toasty outside taking these photos, but totally worth the sweat of course.

                                                                     LOVE this guy.

I just have to say...

Isn't it interesting when you talk to someone who always has something negative to say?  They always pick out the one thing that isn't working out for them or that everything would be great if it weren't for that one thing?  I find this irritating and confusing and I hope I never do it (I'm not saying I've never done it, but I hope I don't any more...)  All you can think about is getting pregnant and now that you are, you are so quick to complain about it?  You are dying to go on vacation and once you are there, you don't think the weather is nice enough?  You are so busy with work and the one day you are not as busy you feel bored?

Don't worry this post won't last long, I just have to say how important it is to be grateful for where you are at and to be able to acknowledge all the good in your life.  I know nothing and no one is perfect but now that we know that, let's move on!  Let's not expect everything to always work out no matter what.  Let's not expect everything to be perfect therefore you are less likely to be disappointed.

I just think we need to spend more time being grateful.  Finding the good in every day.  Finding the good in the people we come in contact with.  And this is a good reminder to us all and to myself.  We took some photos of Matt and I and my baby bump and it was so fun to just revel in my pregnancy a little bit more.  Yes it's hot out and yes I am moving slower than I ever have but it's for a bigger purpose and I am grateful for the time to slow down.  I wish a better perspective and a little more gratitude for us all.

Tales of a pregnant lady...

I thought about renaming our blog to "Tales of a pregnant lady" at least until baby is here.  Too much?  Alright, fine, I won't.  Even so, this journey of pregnancy and becoming a mother has been really amazing.  I love every little kick or punch or knee gouge I feel from this little one because it is the best reminder to just stop and be.  To just feel this little one explore her neighborhood (more or less) for now and I love it.  Even in the middle of the night when I move to my side and she doesn't seem to like it all that much so I move again, I still love it.  Because I know that this little one will be here in my arms and not in my belly (I know she's not really in my belly, but I am around kids a lot and that is what I say so deal with it).  Some days I feel like there is still a lot to be done before our little one arrives.  Some days I feel like I could go right back to bed after I eat my first breakfast (usually cereal and then an hour later I eat a muffin and a banana -delicious).  There are moments during the day I get irritated by the tiniest things that mean nothing - dirty dishes in the sink, the lawn needing to be mowed, or dust on the ceiling fans.  Other times I have a burst of energy where I clean almost every room in our house and it feels great.  And today I called Matt after I walked upstairs holding a laundry basket and I was out of breath!  All of these moments are small and add to this journey because the rest of the time I feel grateful.  So grateful that this little one chose us to be her parents.  So excited to hold her and kiss her face.  So scared to be a protective mom, but confident that Matthew will help keep me sane.  So unsure of whether I will have to work or want to work or trying to figure out all the finances that go along with being a parent.  I am so grateful.

Tips from a pregnant lady:
DON'T be rude to a pregnant lady, it's just mean and you don't want to add any extra stress because you can rest assured she has enough to worry about.
DO tell a pregnant lady she looks cute.  You will make her day.  Pregnancy is a beautiful thing and sometimes in our society we forget that.  IF you don't think she looks cute, then keep your mouth shut.  DON'T feel the need to tell her she has put on too much weight or not enough.  DON'T act like you know more about what is going on with her body than she does.

Good weekend!

What a nice weekend we had!  Friday night my good friend Alisa was in town with her husband Ryan and son Owen.  We visited them this past February and it was so fun to get to see them again in such a short amount of time!  We hung out at our house and then went out to dinner once Matt got home from work.

We then drove only two hours away to see our friend Dale and Jamee and they are now living closer to us (they used to live four hours away).  We saw their nice new house, sat out on the porch during a lovely cool evening and hung out with their daughter Lilli. We told Lilli I have a baby in my belly and she would stop her playing randomly, point to my stomach and then say softly "baby in there".

Dale and Lilli playing "airplane!" 

It was a great weekend seeing good friends.

I have started prenatal yoga and plan to go as much as I can over the next three weeks!

Well, that was nice...

I was at Target a few days ago with my hair in a pony tail (I don't tempt the humidity or heat with doing my hair on these hot summer days) and workout clothes (shorts and a t-shirt) and I noticed this woman probably in her early fourties walking with her young child near me.  I could feel her staring at me but just walked past her, before I made it too far away she quickly said "You look so cute!"  I kind of let out a surprised laugh and then said "Well, thank you!"  I shared this with my husband and a good girlfriend who had her son a few months ago.. we all decided it was definitely the best thing you can say to a woman who is 7 months pregnant.  It is still very surprising the rude things people tend to say (whether they mean well or not) but when someone goes out of her way just to say something sweet.  Well, that was nice!

I think we need to feel free to say more nice things to one another, especially if you can tell someone is not having a good day, or if you happen to notice they are carrying a child.  I now see pregnant ladies everywhere I go and sometimes will smile at them recognizing that they may smile back acknowledging the club we are now apart of together, or they might just look at me like a crazy lady.  Either way, it's the small things that help make ya feel good on hot, tiring days.

What the what...(some light reading)

So my full time job is kind of in limbo at the moment, our program has it's funding until September and with any luck we will get "renewed" for the next three years however that is not looking great.  One of our sister programs has already been completely cut and ends in July.  22 employees in another program were let go last week   Needless to say I am not feeling that secure at my current position, and more than anything I am focused on how we can best provide for our daughter that will join our lives in September with or without this job I have now.  Yesterday I went to a big event called "Get Motivated", the billboards advertise the many faces that may appear when they tour your city including; Colin Powell, Rudy Giuliani, Laura Bush, John Walsh, Joe Montana, Steve Forbes, and Bill Cosby (a few others but I don't feel like looking up their names as I forgot, but just think rich old white guy and you're set).  The arena was packed full of business people likely seeking a free training opportunity as myself and a few co-workers were.  The original price of these tickets was $235.  For real.  Thankfully they rethought that ridiculous idea and gave a ton of free tickets away, and apparently charged $2 bucks for the rest of them.  I think they realized it was more important to have butts in the seat rather than hold out until some goofball actually paid over two hundred dollars to go to this weird, weird event.

An old white guy started the day sharing stories of his success and different ways he has made money in the business world.  Next confetti covered the stage as Rudy Giuliani greeted us all and strategically dodged the confetti pieces from letting them cover his mouth.  His first comment was how the confetti reminded him of his dark days in New York with the endless amounts of snow and how he was blamed for the snow.  Next Laura Bush posed behind her podium as she updated us all on her family and their whereabouts. Mrs. Bush then went straight to recounting some of her memories from 9/11 and then right to the end of her husband's presidency.  She said she got frustrated by the "cowboy caricature" her husband was made out to be.  And discussed a few of the countries she was happy she had the chance to visit.  A few questions ran through my mind while she was on stage... 1. Why is she speaking at a "Get Motivated" event?  2. Why is 9/11 the only thing she felt was worth mentioning throughout her husband's 8 year run as president?  Truly between Rudy and Laura I haven't heard the words 9/11 so much.  3. Why does she say Uganda like "U-Gan (as in Can)- duh".  And finally, 4. There was no other female presenter they could find for this event?  I mean really.  She was the only woman out of the ten speakers and she wasn't even speaking on her own legacy but her husband's.
About an hour and a half later streamers fall from the sky and they start blasting the song "Livin in America" as Colin Powell takes the stage.  I felt like I was in a very cheesy and kinda creepy convention from the movie Yes Man.  Mr. Powell gave a great speech and seemed like a much more welcoming leader and representative of America compared to the first three presenters. 
After spending $9.25 on two tiny bottles of water and a decent muffin, a very weird guy came up on the stage.  He was over the top preachy and opinionated, so much so that you could tell he loved offending half the crowd.  He was a perfect mixture of Dana Carvey's the Church lady because he said "you know where those temptations come from?  .... SATAN!" (I swear he said that).  And Dane Cook because he would crawl and bounce around the stage like a dang monkey.  He even kicked off one of the mum plants to prove a point of wildness.  Also he said things like "dig this" and "this is really major"  I even heard him address us all as "homes".  Next he was a sleazy car salesman because he real goal was to have us buy a ticket to a three day opportunity to learn how to "find our purpose" and "buy property".  What if we had no desire to buy property you ask?  He didn't care.  In fact, you are an idiot if you don't want to buy property! 

It was kind of interesting seeing all of these people in person, even Mr. Cosby who looked old and fragile but still had his pudding face eye rolling charm as you'd hope.  Colin Powell had much more personality then we have ever seen on t.v. (I guess that makes sense considering his role in the U.S. government).  Did I leave with any new information or extra motivation which I am guessing was the point of the training?  No.  Did I entertain myself by observing and taking in the weirdness of it all.  Clearly.

Good day

The weather the past few days has been crazy and it is so hard seeing the devastation of towns nearby that were hard hit by tornadoes.  Yesterday the sirens went off in our neighborhood for about an hour and I found myself sitting in the basement keeping the dogs from running back up the stairs to check out what was going on outside. A nearby neighbor's house caught a small fire on the front room of their house and three fire trucks were in our street trying to resolve that issue, we also lost power.  Needless to say my stomach hurt a little bit after that long day of stressful weather but obviously we are very thankful to see the sun today.

The sky is blue and it's 68 degrees out right now.  I was home and just started to make myself some lunch when Matthew called me and invited me to lunch with him.  It was such a pleasant surprise.  Usually Matt is too busy during the day to take much of a lunch and he has invited me in the past right after I already ate.  Today it worked out perfectly.  I put everything back in the fridge to save for later and drove to Matt's work and picked him up.  We went down town to a lovely gourmet pizza joint we had never been to and got to sit outside with their huge restaurant wall up, feeling the cool breeze through out our entire meal.  We got a very flavorful, healthy pizza and then the most delicious tiramisu we had ever ate.  Eatened?  Ate.  Who knows, the point is... this was a good day.

The baby's room...

Look at that handsome daddy-to-be getting the crib all ready to go.  Matt has been on house project mode and I can't thank him enough for all of his hard work and dedication at improving our house as best we can for our little one.

Jax is not thrilled to be kicked out of the only room in the house with carpet.  But don't worry, he has a big fluffy bed to lay on, and I know he is going to be a great friend to our girl.

This is the almost finished product!  I am going to add beautiful big red window shades that will add another pop of color and darkness for those bright afternoon naps, also I can just push them to the side and let the sun shine in.  The 5 animal painted canvas' are courtesy of my mom, the art teacher.

These two are my favorite... our dogs, of course!  They sure are cute!

I LOVE this corner of the room.  Our lovely rocker, that my mom and Steve got for us and the start to our baby's book collection.  We have some books from when we were kids, plus the new books my softball girls gave us.

Also a beautiful knitted hat for our girl to wear during her first winter.  The purple hat (in the box on the right) has white clouds on it and my brother-in-law's mom made it!

Also, I stayed up till midnight on Friday baking peanut butter cookies and white chocolate macadamia nut cookies. Woah are they good.  Turns out it's dangerous having that many cookies near a pregnant lady.

I feel a big sigh of relief now that we have our girl's room looking more and more like her room.  The to do list is still around and every week if not every day we have something new to take care of, but I will say through it all (even the days I don't feel so great) we are just. so. excited!  Last night little girl was moving and grooving so much it woke me up.  It is amazing to be able to feel her move so much, I know she will be an active little one for sure.  Thanks for stopping by my blog!

10 things that make me happy today

10. Our dog Jaxon, that guy is ALWAYS up for playing and I think it is very cute.  He could just be waking up, exhausted from a walk, or just chillin and if you go at him like you want to play, he shoots up and immediately finds a toy we can play with.  So cute.

9.  SUNSHINE.  We had a perfectly sunny, big puffy clouds kind of day yesterday and the next week is supposed to be about the same 70 degree weather.

8.  Feeling healthy.  At the end of the day I usually need to ice my neck because it gets sore throughout the day but overall I have felt physically great during this pregnancy and I pray that continues...

7.  Peanut butter toast and barbeque chips.  Still one of my favorite things to eat, and I do every day.

6.  Hugs.  How fluffy does that sound? I don't care.  I love coming home and look forward to the hugs I get from my husband and our dogs.  Yes, I hug our dogs.

5.  The Office.  We have netflix and if nothing is on t.v. (which usually nothing is) then I turn on netflix and go to the trusty old episodes of The Office.

4.  Tina Fey.  I love her, duh.  But she is hosting SNL on May 7th and I just saw the preview where she is behind a wind machine and said she is going to show how "hot pregnant women can be" or something along those lines... as she raises her shirt to show you part of her maternity pants that she has on (because she actually is pregnant).  I find her humor very refreshing and oddly close to what I find most funny.

3.  My nephew Ashton!  Of course I could list all of my family members on this list, but seriously this kid is so full of smiles I just can't get enough of seeing his little chubby ADORABLE face.  Every time you make eye contact with him he smiles!  And his smile will brighten any kind of day.

2.  Working from home.  I usually stay in my pj's or workout clothes until I have a meeting or am forced out on an errand and since becoming pregnant I have appreciated this comfort more than ever. 

1.  The farmer's market.  One near our house just opened up last Saturday and I bought fresh lettuce and basil and although I still need to plant them in a pot, we have already enjoyed using them in a few dinners.  So good!

Girl stuff!

Check out all these girlie clothes!  I've heard that many new moms will buy their child a special outfit (or at least something "girl" or "boy") once they find out the gender.  Last Wednesday we found out we are having a girl!  Wednesday night my mom and sister went to a consignment sale for baby stuff and hit the jackpot of affordable clothes.  I then went home with a bag full of girl clothes (not to mention some pants and two dresses for me). 
Today I went out to lunch with my good friend Ashleigh and we went to two cute baby stores.  I decided it was time I buy something for our girl, and I love the new stuff we have!   I bought those two little new born hats, aren't they adorable?!  I bought the two yellow onesies and two long sleeve striped shirts.  And the other outfits are just an example of the big bag of goodies my mom found at the consignment shop.  And the head band is from my friend Alisa!  Our nursery is not even close to being ready, but I know it will be great to get a new dresser for her, and then to start filling it with all of these cute clothes!

It's official!

We are pregnant!  If you are any kind of family member or friend of ours you already know this, and if you happen to see the good news proudly stated on facebook then you know this as well.  But I don't think I have officially blogged about being pregnant, and not that I need to get it out there in blog world to make it real, but it is definitely the biggest thing happening in our lives right now and it's worth mentioning.

This past Wednesday we found out that we are having a baby girl and we could not be more excited!  Seeing her kick and move, and punch, and snuggle her arm next to her face live was... definitely the most amazing thing we have ever seen.  Hearing her heartbeat will remain one of the best sounds ever.  And every single day has become a new wonder in her growth or my belly appearing more pregnant.  With the second trimester I have had more energy and am finally getting to some of the housework I have been meaning to for a while now, and that feels good.  Matt and I are both still shocked when I am the one who says "slow down" while on a walk with our dogs and then when we come home and I have to sit down for a while before thinking of doing something else... then I remind myself a human is being created inside of me at this moment and she needs a lot of my energy, not to mention my brain power.  I have had several slip ups while talking where my brain and mouth have somehow moved miles apart and really have trouble hearing one another.  Matt has done a great job of staying on his toes, handling my weird moments and interpreting almost every thing I say.

Things that used to bother me a little have amplified.  I love our dogs very much, but with all of this rain they come in the house with mud caked on their paws.  One of us sweeps the hard wood floors up, and about twenty minutes later while walking barefoot in the house I step on pieces of dirt.  I look at Jaxon who is the best at getting mud clumps in between his toes, he likes to save those pieces for later, for after we have cleaned the house several times, he makes himself comfy on the rug with a path of newly dropped mud chunks behind him. 

I am getting more of an appetite than I have had since before we got pregnant.  I cleared out all of our winter clothes, or items of clothing I know I won't be wearing for a while and now feel good when I look in the dresser drawers and find only tops that fit me now or that I will grow into. 

I have felt our little girl move around, or kick or punch, not exactly sure what she is doing but I know I have felt flutters unlike anything I have ever felt before.  It almost feels like I swallowed a tiny butterfly. 

My mom bought us some little girl outfits ranging from newborn to 12 months and it is so wild to try and picture our little girl and that she will be wearing those clothes in just a few short months!  Until we get to hold her, meet her and see her beautiful self we will revel in the continuing changes that we will go through on this crazy awesome journey.

Update!

What up!  All of my other days are far greater than that last post, but those days happen too and make me even more grateful for the days I wake up feeling goooood!

Let's go back to my birthday dinner that Matt made for me... He grilled these huge mushrooms after letting them soak up some flavors for a bit.  Grilled bread, mashed potatoes and asparagus.  I mean, what!?  He would not let me even enter the kitchen until he was done creating, it was pretty cute and very tasty.  

And then for my weekend birthday celebration we had some great friends over.  Even Dale and Jamee came to town for the occasion.  It was great seeing everyone and we had a blast... despite what this picture shows:  (the boys took over the living room at one point and got really into a video game, I thought it was funny to see Jamee smashed between the guys on the couch.  Matt looks very intense while playing too.  We didn't let this go on for too long before we had the boy's join us back in reality... still fun though).

This weekend I went to two baby showers.  It is fun to have such a big handful of friends who either just had a baby, or will have a baby in the upcoming months.  I thought this cake was so cute.

My friend Kathleen is having a baby boy in May and I loved the brown and teal colors that were picked for her shower.  So cute!

Here is a picture of us girls at Kathleen's shower, three of the five ladies are preggers (Kathleen on the far left, Lisa in the blue dress and me!)